Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Craving of the day

So this whole pregnancy craving thing? Its real and you better be prepared. Tonight Jen had a craving for "baked goods".... yep baked goods.... She'll never get mad or pissy with you, but she'll continually press the issue. So much so that you start hearing voices... and begin to develop a craving for it yourself. These pregnant women, totally dangerous...
So i got in my car and made a b-line to the store, good thing i did since i was starting to mumble things like "muffin".... and "strudel"....
As I raced though the aisles, leaving a trail of sweat in my wake, i realized that i had no idea what baked good to get. No idea... The panic was really hitting now...
My nose directed me to the smell of fresh baked bread... muffins and cookies... .yum.

Indecision was rampant....scanning the bountiful shelves... i decided my only salvation was to get an assortment. I got muffins and cookies and cake and pie and brownies... as much as i could carry. I piled it high in my arms... it looked like a betty crocker totem pole.
Maneuvering the pile like a circus performer, i made the trek to the checkout line, skillfully avoiding the human cashiers in favor of the computer cashiers... which i find to be less prone to ask the obvious questions... specifically ones like "starting a bake sale, huh?" or "somebody has the munchies....", or "got a pregnant wife at home?"

I drove like a nascar racer.... except i wasn't driving in circles... and i was driving the prius... which is rather slow... and most nascar drivers wouldn't drive a prius... so... anyway... i drove as fast as that little hybrid engine could... fred flintstone would be proud.

After doing ludicrous speed in the prius... i pulled up to the house and grabbed the goods from the back. i narrowly escaped losing the muffins to the drooling attack dog.... and made the procession to the high altar.....
i was sure i could survive...
the presentation of gifts was made to the female praying mantis... muffins....cookies...brownies... cakes....pies....
she loved them... voraciously devouring the globs of cookies and cake... gorging down the brownies...and then....
she called out my name...
and bit my head off...

ha ha ... ok thats not what REALLY happened. but i had fun writing it....
Jen loved the baked goods, and i didn't really get all of what i said... i only got brownies and cookies... and muffins... (i'm a bit of a sweet-tooth too) and she was very appreciative and kissy kissy like that. So i enjoyed going out for her and making her feel happy...

3 comments:

Jen said...

I think my husband is starting to have too much fun with this blogging stuff. :) maybe he just likes teasing the pregnant woman. I really did have a craving for baked goods, but I didn't need three types! I guess he figures they'll last a while. I like to bake and would have done so, but didn't have any ingredients and wasn't going to start baking something at 9pm last night. I figure either we're having a girl who likes her desserts (as most of the women do in my family) or a boy with as big a sweet tooth as his Daddy!

Camila said...

That just made me hungry. :)

Xaparro said...

Wow. The female praying mantid. I wonder what that is in sanskrit. Hey, Will, can't you increase the font size of this blog? It makes me squint too much. Keep on writing. It's fun to read. Maybe we need to buy you a baking book -- although I think I already did. How about some cinnamon raisin bread?